Anza Borrego: Epilogue - Home Again

Mom & Dad

From my first trip as an infant, caged in a baby pen, to my last visit with Analee, Anza Borrego has been my Eden. From my early years until college, I camped in Agua Caliente at least once a year. If there has ever been a constant in my life, the desert is it. No matter what problems were occurring in my life, ups and downs in my family or worldwide strife, the desert was always there. It was either a reward or a refuge. It is an eternal home.

Growing up, I always felt like an only child, even though I have 4 brothers and sisters. All of my siblings left the nest by the time I was twelve, and I was the son of a traveling businessman. When I felt alone, the desert reunited my family. My sisters came in from college in San Diego. My too cool brother was there (if only for a brief skirt chasing rest). My mom was there, of course, and my dad made the time to be there.

As a child, the desert was pure joy. I played in the sand. Hiked on trails. Swam in warm mineral water. We had water balloon fights. We bravely traversed Moonlight Trail in the dark. We watched the rangers give presentations on snakes and stars. We made Easter eggs. We hiked Ghost Mountain. Although I’m sure I’m looking back with rose-colored glasses, it is special to me. It is the one place I can always know that we were a family.

Now those knowing how important family is to me, can probably relate to the issues I had a year or so ago. Again, my attempts to have a family and share my love failed. I was not angry. I was not spiteful. I was just sad. It was like a death. However, I soon realized that from death comes birth. What seemed like a curse was a blessing in disguise.

That is why I’ve never given up on my dream. My dream to have a wife that loves me and a family who I can love. I never gave up because all that soul searching during the past 2 ½ years has lead me to one constant in my life. In fact, two constants in my life, the desert, and most importantly, my family.

Now that you can see that the desert is so strongly connected to my feelings of family, you can no doubt understand why it was imperative for me to return after 10 years and to bring Analee. I returned, not to lick my wounds and seek refuge, but to stand tall and show my scars. I returned to get what I deserve, a desert and a family.