Thursday, February 4, 2010

ABC's Sing-a-Long-Trainwreck from Hades

Undeniably this is the worst DVD ever made.  If MST3K was still in existence, I doubt they would have the cajones to lampoon such an atrocity as this "children's show." 

The DVD consists of 26 "songs", titled from A to Z, with an occasional 42 minute story about the Hare and the Tortoise and some banal drivel about Xavier the never ending story about an X-ray machine.  To compound this DVD-i-cide, the songs are obvious horrid karaoke renditions of kiddie songs with inexplicably atrocious "home" videos of some French family , a 12 year old girl in need of a bra and a belt, a pedophilic old man chasing young girls, a woman  portraying Old MacDonald by using a pitchfork on concrete, and a kids painted like cats when they are singing about dogs.

The karaoke songs are almost tolerable and our kids appear to enjoy them, but the visuals are too much to handle.  I have searched high and low for screen shots of this DVD, but Hitler must have burned all the prints during the French Occupation.  Just imagine a large woman dressed like a harlequin clown and kids with scary painted faces intermixed with blatant stock footage.  

To seal the deal, consider the fact the jovial ball playing child on the DVD cover is nary to be seen in this frenchtesticle tripe of a DVD.  Yet, now matter what we do, our kids repeatedly ask for this show.

Think I'm nuts?  Read the Amazon reviews.  By the way, I consider it no coincidence this DVD sells for $6.66 on Amazon.  Dante never considered this ring of hell in his infamous inferno.

Viva La You Owe Me $3 France.